Being Vulnerable…

“It’s not about perfect. It’s about effort. And when you bring that effort every single day, that’s where transformation happens. That’s how change occurs.”
― Jillian Michaels

Being an introvert is a tad difficult. You enjoy keeping to yourself. Don’t love a ton of company. Have a lot of acquaintances and a few really close friends. You are a perfectionist at times. You tend to have a “I’ll do it” attitude. Which in turn, makes it a hard to be vulnerable.

How on earth does one become vulnerable? It’s one of the hardest things to do as an adult. This is something that 2016 is all about for me. With Growth comes Change and with Change come Vulnerability.

Terrifying but needed.

Throughout the past few months, I have been learning a lot about myself. Most of this occurred after my fiance and I got engaged in January. Let’s list them out:

  • I want to fix everything, including everyone’s problems
  • I have a very hard time asking for help. If I ask for help and I feel that I will look like a failure, a reoccurring feeling in my life. 
  • I tend to do a ton of projects all at once, only to burn myself out with a quickness.
  • I’m a perfectionist that is also a major procrastinator when it comes to anything with numbers. Finances, yuck.
  • I always feel like I am disappointing to people. Yet another reoccurring feeling in my life.
  • I have a fear of pushing my limits when it comes to success. I know what I completely want but I’m afraid of failing not only myself but everyone around me. 

A small list with a ton of things in between the lines. Being afraid of success is such a sad thing. It’s lonely. It’s tiring.

So, I am done being tired of not doing. This year has been amazing. A lot of tears, “eureka” moments, discovery and a lot more. I am pushing myself to do things. Slowly doing them. Asking for help, with small things for now that adds up to a lot.

This is my year to grow. I am growing. The best part is I am ready, aware of my weakness, my fears, my desires and so much more.

So, I am asking you. What is holding you back from grabbing a hold of your dreams? Why are you letting that stop you? 

Looking deeper inward is terrifying. Crack those doors. If some are too painful to open, don’t be afraid to seek help elsewhere. It’s okay! Actually, it’s incredibly brave! Be brave with me. The change might feel slow, but better slow and steady than fast and messy.

Introverts 1

I may be an introvert at heart. But, I am more than ready to challenge myself to show that even us introverts can be vulnerable and brave to the entire world.

Join me, won’t you 🙂

On the Easel:

As a side note, here is the colored pencil African Elephant piece I am working on. A bit of an update. Have any questions on my work? Or interested in this or any other piece? Feel free to contact me on my website.

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